worth.

This feeling is creeping in but its not cold like others. It's like a virus that spreads through my body. Mistakes are made and here I am sitting in my blood, the scrape scraping sound of flesh pulls my mind away. Punishment for my deeds. All worth is gone. Empty without a ray of sun. Grey clouds cover my horizon and I know that I deserve it.
Revisit the lacerations with the clear liquid that makes it catch on fire; 50 times the initial pain, because I deserve it. Hopes and dreams, soft touches I longed for, lips I wished to caress, those yearnings are gone, burned away in sin and blood.
Soften my heart and help me be worth it, because I am lacking in worth.

1/20/11

Fire
The journey changes, first she's earth, then water, now fire. Full of burning Passion and desire. She's red and cold and smoldering down. But now like a phoenix, she burns down to nothing to start over again. She's alone for now, but that's fine, because its hard to notice when you're on fire.

your lips.

I thought just once would be nice. Let's rekindle that old flame just for the sake of the heat. You wrap your arms around me and suddenly there is no where else I'd rather be. Pull me close and hold me tight. Your lips are just as I remembered, maybe even warmer.

I thought you were the one who would get addicted to me, but this took me off guard. I'm craving you now, something I haven't felt in years, and the worst part is I think you don't even care. I was just another mouth, another touch, another body to be warm next to yours.

I'm dying inside now, and I blame you. Jealousy is taking over and any thought of another near you makes me burn.

You haven't talked to me since.
I need you.
I need you out of my head
...before I explode.

fire.

Passion is a dangerous thing. My theme for the year (or longer) seems to be fire. Fire and burning and passion and rebirth. All of which are intertwined in some way. Fire consumes, which is what I want to do. I want to consume you. I want your love, and yours, and yours too.

Fire burns, which is what my heart does when I rage. My eyes burn when I rage. My body burns when I rage, and when I consume.

Passion is a fire that ignites quickly and spreads through out your veins, corrupting ever last corner of your mind till it's the only thing you can think about.